Beliebers are batshit crazy

Originally posted at MimicLives.com

beliebersIt was only a matter of time before I got here, and have touched on this kind of crazy in the past, referring to them as “superfans”. In this case, it’s the lunatic fringe known as Beliebers, the cult following of Justin Bieber. It’s made up of scores of nutcase teenage girls who would kill their own parents for the slightest glimpse from him. They’ve infested the internet through ridiculous fan sites, Facebook pages, Tumblr accounts and YouTube videos.

To get this out of the way, I’m not a fan of Justin Bieber. He’s boring as shit, very generic and hopefully will one day go through puberty. But this isn’t really about him. It’s about the crazy clan of insane people who act as if he’s the Second Coming of Christ. I used to think the Church of Miley Cyrus was bad, but these idiots take it to extremes that make me want to punch people in the face. To illustrate my point, let’s watch one of his worshippers.

Having watched this, I can only conclude that she is either drunk, on drugs, really dumb, or perhaps a combination. I’m not sure why she was almost crying either, but justifying his greatness based on his hair (which actually looks like a shitty wig from Big Lots) and looks is ridiculous, yet the core of her thesis. That, and he’s successful. But he’s only successful because of crazy people like this who think he’s great due to outside appearance and horrible songs. What he does is no different than the bullshit teenyboppers on Nickelodeon.

She also had an idea of why a girl wouldn’t like Justin Bieber. She’s either a lesbian, an attention whore, or fat and ugly. It should be worth pointing out that the girl in this video, as mentioned by others, is not skinny herself and isn’t the prettiest peach in the pile. She’s also attention whoring herself throughout Youtube with this video with her whiny near to tears plea to stop hating her wannabe boyfriend, who looks a hell of a lot like Samantha Ronson.

belieber-madnessAs the video continues, she proves to us how great he is by watching a video of him on her IPod. She doesn’t show it to us, but somehow we’re supposed to understand his greatness anyway. She also gets pissed off at a girl in the video who pushes him away from her, saying that she would never do that. She also calls the girl a bitch and clearly has animosity toward her. This made me want to jump through the screen so I could choke her and yell “IT’S A FUCKING VIDEO YOU STUPID ASS! IT’S FAKE!” But alas, they haven’t invented that part of technology yet.

Near the end, she shows us posters of him, shrieking loudly into the mic about his eyes and how cute he is. All I saw was a 10 year old kid trying to look cool. Somehow, that translates to “great music artist” in her mind. By the end, her point was to be proven based almost completely on his looks. She also said that no girl should break up with him and she wishes he would make her one less lonely girl, making it incredibly easy to see why she is, a lonely girl.

She also points out that he doesn’t care that people hate him, which makes the need to create a video dismissing haters quite pointless. If he doesn’t care, why would you need to do this?

60524884This is a very good example of the crazy people who worship him. I know one of them, and she is precisely the same way. She insists on never saying the word “never” because Justin Bieber tells her not to. She believes all of the ridiculous hype around him, believes he’s a virgin and that he would never do anything wrong. I frequently want to hit her with a brick.

Let’s go over a few things. Firstly, fuck your looks. I really don’t give a shit if someone looks like John Goodman in drag or Diora Baird. Horrifying or gorgeous, it doesn’t have a thing to do with skill and ability. No matter how attractive you think he is, it has nothing to do with the music he makes. Trying to convince me of his awesomeness based on his physical appearance is stupid as hell, so despite being a teen heartthrob, his music still sucks.

Justin-bieber-selena-ass-grabSecond, he’s not the perfect angel the press wants you to believe. Do you really think that when you’re reading something that says Uncut or Unrestricted that it really is? You would have to be the stupidest person on the planet to think that the celebrity pop tarts you worship are really as good as these magazines, movies, books, and news articles want you think. They are human beings you stupid fuck! They have the same flaws and fucked up morals as you do. They tell you what they want you to know, controlling the information about these retards so you’ll buy into the image they want to project. News flash: he fucked Selena Gomez. When someone asks you about it and you dodge the question, you’ve answered it.

bieber-steals-footballOne thing that Beliebers love to rally against is the idea that he could be the father of Mirah Yetter’s kid. She’s the lady who came out a few months back saying that he knocked her up, and thus caused a shit storm to appear on the internet. Besides him being Jesus, something else they like to slam is how she isn’t the most gorgeous woman to walk the Earth (i.e.. themself)–because looks are everything, personality means nothing. I’m not one to stand on either side of this debate, but the chance that he fucked this woman is hard to dismiss when the results are set to be private. Why not make them public if there is no chance?

But no, Justin has never had sex. He hasn’t even seen a girl naked. Hell, he hasn’t even seen himself naked. All he does is write love ballads and dance songs while thinking about each of his fans individually. Afterwards, he eats cookies and milk, searches for a cure for cancer and saves about 300 acres of rainforest.

bieber-student-loansJustin Bieber is just another pop tart who has shown up for the media to feed on. He’s here to sell records, t-shirts, posters and women’s perfume (for some weird reason). There have been many before him and there will be many after him. They’re all perfect creations that can do no wrong. Meanwhile, you dump more and more money into the bullshit they sponsor and still say they do this for the love of their fans. That must be why they sell all that crap for love and not dollars.

Being a fan is one thing, but putting these dick bags up on pedestals like they can do no wrong is only setting yourself up for a mental collapse when they do something outside of your protective  bubble of righteousness. Miley Cyrus fans have seen that, now that she’s broken outside of the Disney image and proven herself to be a human being: fucked up and weird, just like the rest of us. Beliebers would do best to either drink the fucking kool-aid already or take the blinders off. This mental handicap they’ve inflicted themselves with is only going to cause issues for them down the road.

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