Entertainment

Putting My View of Miley Cyrus Into Perspective

I have to be honest about this, as it makes no sense to not be. When it comes to Miley Cyrus, I’m conflicted. Many times, I completely dig her. Other times I want to hit her with the shovel. When it comes to pointing out her stupidity, I’m right on it. It’s almost as if she’s the new “Paris Hilton” for me (which I alluded to on one of my tracks, though I would fuck Miley and wouldn’t let my dick be in the same room as Paris). However, I have also attempted to go to bat for her, which was mostly me tearing the asshole out of her idiot ass super fans.

Clearly, Miley Cyrus raided Cindi Lauper’s Closet

Miley just hit the headlines doing the exact same thing that Anne Hathaway recently did. It shocked people around the world, and is something we should all be paying attention to. Fuck the Olympics, it’s not as important. Miley Cyrus cut her hair.

She’s catching criticism for it left and right, as I’m sure she knew was going to happen. You don’t chop off most of your hair and expect people not to say something, especially if you’re Miley Cyrus. Actually in her case, you don’t do anything without expecting someone to say something, present company obviously included.

Miley posted pictures of herself on Twitter, showing off not just her new hair but a clothing style no one would have quite pictured beforehand. When I saw it the first thing I thought of was Cyndi Lauper. It was very 80’s, which may have been one of the reasons I liked the picture so much. Others weren’t so big on it, but that’s also to be expected. She’s Miley Cyrus, the idol to teen girls around the world. Here she is in a see through top, black bra, combat boots and tights she bought from the WTF Store. I’m sure parents around the world were flipping the hell out.

Slut Miley Cyrus Showed Her Bra

“I can’t believe she showed her bra! Now people will know she has tits! What a bitch! My child will never watch her again!”

says angry lunatic pompous ass bag parents around the world

The heading isn’t like that for the attention. It’s like that because that’s the way people seem to react to her. I’ve mentioned it before, and it’s worth saying again that some people are crazy as fuck when it comes to celebrities. They expect them to be angels. Miley showed her bra in a picture, so parents are going stupid. The gossip blogs covering it are also reacting in goofball ways, as if she’s somehow unworthy of any attention now. You’re all dumb. Really, really dumb. I wanted to keep the insult simple because of just how dumb you are.

But no, she showed her bra so we should burn her. I say we burn her bra instead and leave her in that shirt.

I know the day is coming that she’s going to show us her tits. I’m certain it is. I’m also certain that it will be the day she finally kills off the child idol-ism that she’s carried for so long. Maybe she should do it soon to finally get rid of it. I think it’s the biggest cause of the stupidity that attacks her in the first place. No one would complain if Cameron Diaz popped her tits out. I didn’t see anyone throwing fits when Keira Knightly’s tits showed up in A Dangerous Method. If Miley did it, people would flip the fuck out.

I’d buy the movie and watch that scene multiple times over. Probably make a screensaver.

My take on her new pictures

Miley Cyrus looks sexy as fuck in this picture

I completely dig the picture. I like that Miley is trying to be different, to be whatever she herself wants to be. Too many times I see jackass celebritards running around wearing the latest trendy things. They wear nothing but whatever happens to be fashionably cool.

Meanwhile, Miley’s rocking random things she found after using a hot tub time machine.

I don’t mean to sound as if she never wears anything trendy. I’m sure she does, but Miley has had a habit of going her own way, regardless of what people are saying.

A few of the pics she posted aren’t so great. One of the up close ones is less than attractive (to put it nicely for once), but it’s because of the picture, not her. It just came out crappy. Then there’s the lipstick one. That’s the one that moved Miley way the hell up my “I’d hit it” list (though she wasn’t far down to begin with).

Personally, I think she looks fantastic. A few of those pics (in particular the one of her laying down) are beautiful. I’m not really digging the nose ring so much, but it works for her. I’m just not a fan of piercings. Still, she looks very good.

My Perspective of Miley Cyrus

Miley Cyrus and, I’m guess Rosie O’Donnell

I’ve given Miley a lot of shit over the last year or so. Some of it in music, but most of it in ranting. Actually, the music wasn’t really giving her shit but more like using her as a target for sexual comments. I couldn’t deny that she’s hot, so she tends to come to mind when I need to reference someone I would fuck like a drunk Thor.

I’ve come to certain realizations about Miley, and why it is that I stay so conflicted with her. She reminds me of a friend I used to have. She was great looking, fun to be around, but was so stupid you just couldn’t deal with her at times. I’m talking Kelly Bundy dumb. In Miley’s case, she’s not stupid, she just occasionally says incredibly stupid things. I’ve recently been coming to terms with the fact that it’s mostly because she’s a teenager, and just like pretty much every teenager, she thinks she knows everything. I used to be one too and thought I was a genius. I wasn’t. I am now, but not then. It took a few more years.

I was talking to my wife about Miley and explained to her that I don’t hate her. In fact, most times I really like her. She’s talented, beautiful, sexy and has a great understanding of self worth. That may be my favorite quality of hers, closely followed by the sexy part. Very closely.

The idiotic things she says at times are what make me rip on her. No, it’s not a good idea to tell children that sex is beautiful. That’s just stupid. No parent wants to tell their child that sex is beautiful and magical. Also, using social media and the Internet to gain a following and become a successful artist is perfectly fine. Just because it was harder to do before the Internet doesn’t mean it should be now. If that was the case, I wouldn’t know about any of the artists I listen to because not one of them is on the radio or TV. Thankfully, the Internet can help you become famous for your talent (or lack of in Rebecca Black’s case).

This picture is basically a digital photo version of Viagra

Not that she would give a shit, but the Miley Like/Dislike Meter is pretty steady at about 75/25. I like her a lot more than dislike. Others don’t fair as well, but it’s because they offer no reason for me to like them, and several reasons to want to hit them with my car. I doubt Miley will ever end up on that list. She seems to be a normal teenage girl who just says really stupid things sometimes.

I hope she throws a few more pics up because I think she looks kick ass. And that body shot that she posted makes me want to hump my monitor. Again.

She is pretty comparable to being dressed as an Eskimo while on fire. That’s quite hot, in case you didn’t get it.

So the new style, if that’s what it actually is, I dig. I think it was more or less just a momentary thing though, and that’s cool. She’ll probably go back to dressing in something else that makes idiot parents complain and want to ban her from lunchboxes everywhere.

 

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